RUBBER DUCKIE YOU'RE SO FINE

and im lucky that you're mine...

WaterOffADec'sBack 1381 DEF MoistWeatherBunns 1251
He's off the bottom!!! It happened! A little more on whos fallen below him later....But the Ducks are finally migrating north up the ladder and weren't intimadated by getting a little wet by the moist weather on the way through. Collingwood Jack 112, like a never ending packet of salt and vinegar chips, crispy till the end. Old McDonald 118 and Duncan 101 solid, Greenwood 112 a handy inclusion, but it was the quacking good fwd line that reads Boak 125, Brown 128, Franklin 112 and Caddy 99 that makes Duck the happiest....Getting Murph and Viney back to the bench and playing also made a little bit of excitement wee come out. Henderson 55 and Hibberd 48 not all they're quacked up to be and will probs find the door/pine soon. JayneY has now lost 5 from her last 6 falling down to 6th on the ladder but WAYYYYYYYYYY above her husband on the ladder...Suckling 79, Thompson 69, May 76 and Grundy 86 round out a disappointing backline. Dunkley 40, Lamb-bert 64, and BillboJack'ins 57 still no good. Goldy 112, Titch 155 (hes back!), Bont 120 (hes back!) and Hooker 117 (Pineapple Head) all very good. The Weatherbunns should get Hurley and Acres back soon. And the ban on sponge bath Ollie and his Wines should be lifted soon......surely.

The Ducks were all about the business, whilst Ollie doesn't know what he needs to do to get a game with JayneY

THE FALL FROM GRACE

Moistly Fine 1277 DEF KingMoistPant 1113
Even with Rich 51 and Shaw 54 in the defence and Roys favourite' Lynch 72 and Taranto 85 in the fwd line, Mike still got all the biscuits and has charged up the ranking out of the relegation zone...for now. The Moistly Fines had this sequencial scoring down to an art form with Beams 109, JPK 108 and Shiel 107, before Heeney 105 and Brayshaw 105 forgot who was suppose to score 106. and McLean 100, DeGoey 111 and LDunstand 102 just fucked it all up....A solid 92 from Mills on the bench.
Simon, The King, Oh Moist One...has fallen from the top of the podium last year all the way down to the worst position ever (below Michael). He's starting to get some form though, thanks to JayneY donating Jeremy McGLovin to Simons backline 123, Thouy (thanks Steve) 122, and Yolmaannn 99. Pendles 94 with one leg was good. Hanners 52 could find himself on a plane to Fuckoffsville very soon. Ward 64, Taylor 46, Durerayray 54 and HooleyDooley 62 might book seats near Hanners. One positive....the only way is up!

Stabby little Michael enjoying the demise of Dear King Simoffrey

STEVE KEEPS WINNING

Wines For Swallow? 1254 DEF More Than A Tip 1088
Almost as confusing and exciting as Jack Macrae pumping out scores above 150 is the fact Stephen keeps winning. Now into 5th. The Fyfe factor 101 was less of a barometer this week as Darling Jack 181 took control to sink Roy's Tigers and in doing so lifted Steves Swallowers to the full mouthful in the promised land. Webster 107 and J.Roo 114 the only digits needed. Lewis 69, Cripps 44, Stewart 57, Salem 62, Rance 78 shows that it doesnt matter how many sub digit scores you have if Dan throws out zeros. Curnow didnt get suspended but Dan thought he should have to pay the price by staying on the field anyway, even if he was injured. Dan also generously left Kelly 48, Kruezer 60, Bruest 61 and Higgins 76 to spud it up. He also thoughtfully left Rockliff and his 26 touches 102 on the pine pony too. Thanks Dan. Phillips-head 121 and the non broken Adelaide Rory 'Roy' Laird 102 doing some goodness.

'Hold Me Jack! I'm flying' - Rose Roy Mitchell

SLOPPYS SECONDS INTO SECOND

Sloppy's Seconds 1313 DEF Moistchamp2018 1301
The 4th best score of the weekend wasnt enough for the soon to be renamed MoistChamp2018 to pull off a win. Currently in 4th, Ms Watts will rue picking the wrong Chinese Power player with Salty Polec 73 out spiced by Powells Pepper 128 (on the bench). It would have been enough to get her up! So would have any of Hogan 63, Martin 79, Witherspoon 66 or Geary 87 getting anywhere near their averages. Howeeeeeeee 121, Parrrrrker 109, Jarryd Eyebrows 126, Heppell 113, Danger 114 and Gunner 102 all finding some form. As for the Sloppys, its the second venture into 1300+ land (and first since round 1) off the back of her usual suspects Cripps 152, Jones 116, DMartin 103, Grundy 109 and a new two....Scorey McKernan 114 and Charlie Springboost Cameron 92. (Throwing away Dixon and Wingard who both went onto scoring 85+ didnt hurt too much)....Robbo 73, Rough 77 and Ross 79, which sounds like a shitty breakfast radio team played like theyre a shitty radio team, Findlayson 62, validated why I dropped him and Simmo 72, had to play in a Carlton defence that got flogged.... Hodgey 79 should have gotten way more points a) for being a good bloke b) sledging his Hawforn fwiends and c) for winning. obviously only hawks players can unlock free kicks and the multiplier combo. Swallow Lyons and Fisher made a solid bench! 92 82 82.

It's as if Lauras team has a nap in the middle of the weekend only to wake up refreshed at the end.

TOP OF THE TABLES HAVE TURNED

Lever Wanting More 1562 DEF Frostbites 1239
After two weeks as the top scorer of the round the Frostbites have been handed a bitterly cold smashing. Adams 71, Son of GOD 55, E-Bert 80, Menegondola 59, Gray 67 and Hoff 89 all way down on their season averages. BigRoy McEvoy 116, Hawkins 95, Neale 110, The Mask of Zorko 121, and Harry Andrews WHO?? 115 getting the job done. Leaving Witts 129 on the pine would have hurt if you were allowed to play two ruckman....and Smith 107 outscoring 3 of 5 of the mids....
Pulling three games clear of 2nd place, way out in front, shows how greedy the Levers are in wanting everything. Seems like a great time to go away for a few weeks. Hopefully Macrae 177 and Lloyd 173 dont go away....ever. Yeo 113, Ryan 121, Zerrett 118, Gaff 114, Redden 108, Gawn 121, Anderson 113 all over triples. Harmes 69 couldnt back up his monster, Smith 77 tagged geelong players, Daniel 75 was a very small man in a very rainy game of slidey around. Spaghettio 89 may get replaced by a returning benchy Curnow. McVeigh 125 playing catch with Lloyd helped my bench morale as did the returning Walters 82....Lids and Greene to come.

See you next...month

Be good when im gone.
The Kings Hand
xx